Monday, 5 September 2011

4) Laziest Gremlin

Fredric the laziest gremlin slouched off of his latest victim, an ninety eight year old blind pensioner. He felt proud of himself. He’d hid the poor guy’s heart pills then sat on her neck as a pleasant day dream of a seaside vacation. He hadn’t messed this one up like the last few of his assignments. So, he curled up on the threadbare couch and in the sunlight he took a nap, forgetting that the agency would know when his job was done and want him to get on to the next one.
    His evil-phone rang in his pocket, jolting him away. He felt shame and fumbled the phone out and flipped it open. The number was from the agency.
    “Huh, hi.” He said, a little groggily.
    “Fredric, hello. Were you sleeping on the job again?” It was Romain, his handler, who would have known precisely when the job had been completed.
    “Yes, sir! I mean, no, sir. No, I wasn’t sleeping. I was just making the flat a little more chaotic. You know, covering my tracks.” Fredric sputtered.
    “Look, Freddy. You’re already twenty demerits in the hole. If I had put in your report early last week you know you’d be cleaning bathrooms right now, right?”
    “I. I’m sorry.” Fredric sputtered.
    “I don’t want to hear it. Let’s just get you back to work, okay? Are you ready for a real assignment now? Or do you want to stick with the geriatrics until you’ve got your Mojo back?” Romain said.
    “No, no, I’m good to go. What’s next?” Fredric said.
    “Egypt, 17th century. We need you to hide a key.” Romain said.
    “Easy enough. Let’s go!” Fredric said.
    “Not so fast. There’s going to be lots of people around and it’s imperative that you’re not seen.” Romain said.
    “You can trust me.” Fredric said.
    “Harumph.” Said Romain and pushed the button.
    Fredric had just enough time to slip his evil-phone back into his pocket before the chaos dust enfolded him and teleported him away.

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